Three Scam Killer Rules to Stop Scams Cold

I’ve written a monthly tip on how to avoid scams for over a decade. During that time, I’ve seen new tricks appear almost constantly—fake delivery notices, urgent bank calls, medical benefits that sound just believable enough.

But here’s the truth: You don’t need to memorize every scam to stay safe.

Scams change. Human behavior doesn’t. When I started writing about scams in 2012, the Nigerian letter scam was big. It was easy to spot thanks to the bad grammar, typos, and poor quality. These days, AI is making such poor quality scams seem laughable. But with all of today’s sophistication, every successful scam still relies on the same few tactics. Once you know how to spot those, most scams fall apart on their own.

Rather than trying to memorize every single scam (which would drive you crazy in no time!) memorize these three words: Pause. Ask. Verify. Once you know those, you can stop almost any scam in its tracks. Let’s dive into the first rule of how to avoid scams that can stop scammers in their tracks—the pause rule.

Rule #1: Anything urgent is allowed one pause

Scammers need speed. They want you worried, rushed, or flustered—before your common sense has time to catch up. So give yourself permission to pause. It’s a way for you to have time to think and maybe even stop the scam before it starts.

That pause can look like:

• Hanging up the phone
• Not clicking a link in an email or text message
• Saying “I’ll call you back”
• Taking ten minutes before doing anything

Here’s another truth—nothing legitimate disappears in ten minutes. Real banks, doctors, government offices, and businesses expect verification. They do not punish people for being careful. Urgency is a tactic, one you don’t have to succumb to.

Rule #2: Ask Four Questions

You don’t need expertise to protect yourself—just a few simple questions to ask yourself before taking any action. The perfect time to do this is during the pause. If something doesn’t feel quite right, trust that instinct—it’s your first line of defense. Here are four questions that can stop any scam in its tracks:

1. Who contacted you? Did you reach out to them—or did they contact you out of the blue? If they contacted you, that’s the wrong answer.
2. What are they asking you to do right now? Is there pressure to act immediately? If so, fall back to Rule #1.
3. How do they want to be paid or responded to? Gift cards? Wire transfer? A link? If you’re being asked to trust someone you don’t know and let them control how you respond, bail out immediately.
4. What happens if I say “no” or “not now”? Do you simply lose out on a deal, or is the other person making threats, trying to instill fear, or manipulate you emotionally? All of these are major red flags, and if you’re not completely comfortable, trust your gut.

The wrong answer to any one of these questions should be enough to have you trash the message, hang up, or walk away. Don’t be intimidated or shamed into continuing on when the red flags are waving in the breeze.

Rule #3: Verify Outside the Conversation

Scammers are very good at sounding official. They may know your name, your bank, even partial account details. None of that proves who they are. But, here’s the thing—verification only counts if you’re the one doing the verification. This goes back to what I said above about letting the other person tell you to trust them when you don’t know them.

There are so many ways to verify things safely. While AI can make a perfect replica of a human voice or a website, it can’t be used to trick you if you use trusted sources. What does this look like?

• Hang up and call the number on the back of your card
• Visit the official website you already know
• Call a trusted person before acting
• Look up the organization on your own

Legitimate businesses don’t mind you verifying who they are before you take action. Scammers depend on you notdoing it. So, here’s the rule to remember: If they contacted you, they don’t get to help you verify who they are. 

Final Thoughts

Scams will keep evolving—new technology, new tricks, new ways to sound legitimate. But the tactics underneath never change: rush you, confuse you, and get you to act before you think. That’s why these three rules work against any scam, whether it’s one I wrote about in 2012 or one that hasn’t been invented yet.

Pause. Ask. Verify. It’s that simple. You don’t owe anyone your time, your money, or an explanation—especially not a stranger who contacted you out of the blue. Trust your gut, and when something feels off, it probably is.

If you missed last month’s scam tip, you can find it here. And, if you’d like to check out all of my scam tips, use this link.